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RoCforever7
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read my profile
sign my guestbook
Name: ben
Country: Luxembourg
Metro: Suscitatio
Birthday: 2/5/1987
Interests: hokay, hokay, i finally changed this so it no longer says that my profile picture is of my niece, since that is about a year and a half outdated..... pretty much.
chat with me and you'll find out pretty quickly what i'm interested in, although it might be easier to find what i'm NOT interested in.
Expertise: being a jerk, or a dork, or any demeaning terminology you might come up with, except for inappropriate ones. j/k, actually, i'm not sure what i'm good at, i'll let ya know when i figure it out though.
Occupation: Other
Industry: Other
Message: message me
Member Since:
10/5/2004
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| crazy?
yes i know, i haven't been on here in like 2 months, sorry to those of you that really actually care, but if that's the case, get a facebook, i actually talk to people on there  that goes for a few of you that this was the only place i talked to you. and jess (yes, you dramaqueen) i'll get on soon so we can chat that old philosophy jazz we used to chat. kimberlie jean, i'll catch you sometime, when i get a phone i'll try and remember your number, and give you a call, we'll chat and have a grand old time. everyone else? i don't have time to talk about you, or i would, those were the first two that popped into mind, the third one was kimbosha, get a stinking facebook 
haha, have a good one, you guys, and God bless
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| two weeks wasn't so bad, i'm back at cedarville, and so far it's been
amazing, and i'm not gonna lie... i'm not missing xanga all that much,
except for the few of you that i ONLY talk to you on here, i miss that.
anyway, as you can see, it's a bit late, and church is in the
morning. but this is kinda a journal, so i thought i'd enter that
i'm really excited about the year, even though there are a lot of
things that could make me depressed or dread the year... i'm just
excited, normally that sort of thinking happens in the bathroom...
which is kinda odd, we just won't go there.
have a good one
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| so i think i'm going to quit xanga for a week or two, probably closer to a week because i'm just that addicted, which is why i'm doing it i spend too much time on xanga, so it's time to spend it on something else.
so bye for now, those of you who know me know how to get ahold of me if you need to anyway.
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| Hi RoCforever7! It's been 666 (wow, that's a big number) days since you joined Xanga... won't you support us by going Premium?
yeah... it's my satan day i guess...
I CUT MY THUMB OPEN!!!
oww... it hurts to hit the space bar, so i'm not going to anymore. i'mjustgoingtoforgetaboutit.
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| She didn't even notice, or pay much attention
As the tide came in and swept her three into the ocean
so i've been listening to a song pretty much nonstop, it's called the tide by the spill canvas, and i won't bore you with it, because when i try and write something serious, a fraction of the people will stop to read it, and an even smaller fraction will actually say something back.
but being one of the fraction at times, i'll write it for those of you who actually care to read past the small rant here
so this song's basic message is that love is real, live for the moment. in fact, for reference, here's the final chorus, where he changes up the words:
No, heaven's not a place that you go when you die
It's that moment in life when you touch her and you feel alive
So live for the moment
And take this advice, live by every word
Love's completely real, so forget anything that you have heard
and live for the moment now
so as i read that, i realize that i don't agree theologically with it, but at the same time, in a lot of ways, it agrees with me. it's about 3 kids whose mother was bed-ridden by her "ex-lover", their father, and she tells them that love isn't real, but the children have a hard time believing it, and they grow up, but none reach the age of 15 because their mother didn't care and they were "swept out to sea".
as i've been thinking about the song, i've realized something about my life, and the lives of people i see around me. we're all living for "when...":
it'll be better when.... when i go back to school, when i'm married, when that boy actually likes me back, when i get a good job, when i get to see my friends, when i don't have to worry about this, worry about that.
we're always preparing for the next thing, never enjoying the one we actually have, looking to the next bigger better thing, the next fun event. so we go through lives, working for the weekend, living for that answer to all our problems, retirement, where you finally have the time to do what you no longer have the energy or inclination to do, so instead you waste away the rest of your years sitting on a porch in a rocking chair watching as the children who actually have a love for the moment grow into teenagers and into adults and make the same mistakes you do, but you never see it because you're dead before they get there.
it's like the movie click, where he fast forwards to when he thinks the grass will finally be greener, when his cold is gone, when the fight with his wife is over, when he gets his promotion, and he wastes away his friends, his family, and his life till all he has is no good place to hide and no one to confide in. it never got better, and in the end he realized that it's those moments, good or bad, that you actually feel alive.
we can't live for the past, but we have to learn from it, we can't live for the future, but we have to plan for it, what we've been given is the moment.
it's where we live.
the present.
don't waste it.
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